


Drunken Shenanigans

by OKami_hu



Category: Hanna Is Not A Boy's Name
Genre: Drinking, Frottage, Kink Meme, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 07:21:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1257751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OKami_hu/pseuds/OKami_hu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Conrad accompanies Hanna in a bar then takes the sloshed redhead home and things take an unexpected turn after that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drunken Shenanigans

**Author's Note:**

> an old prompt fill for the LJ kinkmeme

"So why me and why not Mr. Zombie?"

"Aah, you know, Doc 'borrowed' him," Hanna indicated the quotation marks with his fingers and a grimace. "He said he needed some muscle for packing stuff and he just dragged him away. Which left me without a chaperon."

"So I'm here to play babysitter," Conrad summarized resigned, but Hanna patted him on the shoulder cheerfully.

"Naaahh, more like a bodyguard! You're to protect me when they want to throw me out for being underage EVEN THOUGH I'm twenty four... And to keep me out of trouble. There was this occasion when I had a bit too much and started to hit on a guy, 'cause he had long hair and I thought he was a woman! Ha!"

The laughing redhead claimed another glass of vodka-orange, and Conrad drifted off, pondering about why it was nearly impossible to stay angry with Hanna for an extended period of time. The boy was so open, so friendly and cheerful, it was like a charm spell that made you forget about his shortcomings, like the total lack of common sense.

The latter became more and more apparent as the glasses started to pile up at Hanna's left. His blue eyes were shining and he kept on giggling and telling awful jokes; but still, Conrad was less annoyed with him than normally. Alright, a few of those jokes weren't even that bad. But all good things come to an end.

"That'll be enough," the vampire took the last glass from Hanna. "You had too much already. We're going home."

"Pfft-" Hanna pouted and with a maneuver worthy of a master thief, he filched the drink from Conrad's hand to down it. "You're not my mum," he slurred slightly. Conrad sighed.

"I may not be, but I can haul you up and spank you still. It is enough, Hanna. You're drunk."

"Spankin'...? Kinkeh-" The redhead winked at his friend, and moved closed. "Have I told ya, how sexy your name is, huuuhh? Conraaaad."

"What?" The deadpan expression on the vampire apparently looked really funny, because Hanna sporfled. "Haha, I bet you be blushin' if you weren't a vamp- But reeeeally, you're a sexy beast. If I keep on misbehavin', you'll spank me for real?" He leaned his chin into his hand and batted his eyelashes at Conrad.

"You ARE drunk and we're leaving, now," Conrad declared flatly. Hanna flirting with him, it was most unnerving.

The boy kept on pouting full force, but eventually placed the empty glass down and slipped off his chair. He swayed a bit, and when the vampire steadied him, he took the opportunity to wound his frail arms around Conrad's neck.

"Can I get a smoochie? Conraaaad?" He whined cutely and offered his puckered lips. The vampire glanced around rather nervously. "Hanna, you're embarrassing me in public. If you don't stop, I'm going to bite you."

"Spankin' and bitin', you're really sharp on this, aren'cha...?" Hanna grinned but the vampire's stern glare seemed to finally penetrate the intoxicated daze.

"A'rite, a'rite... Take me home, Connie."

With an exasperated sigh, the vampire took the boy's arm and after paying for all the drinks, he led Hanna out to the parking lot, where they left the car. The redhead sank into the comfortable seat with a delighted sigh, seemingly dozing off immediately. Conrad started the engine and rolled out into the sparse late night traffic.

"Will Mr. Zombie be home when I drop you off?" he questioned and Hanna perked up a bit, shaking his head. "Nopes, Doc said he wan'ed him all nite..."

Oh GREAT. So this irresponsible drunk will be home alone? Conrad groaned. He couldn't really just drop off the boy, he might do something stupid without supervision...

"Nnngh, you'll spend the night at my place, then. But if you throw up on anything, I swear I'll drown you in the sink."

"Luv ya too-" Hanna mumbled absent-mindedly and dozed off.

Lightweight.

\---

Conrad let Hanna sit on the couch and walked out to the kitchen to make coffee. He still had a stash from the less perishable groceries, for situations like this. He just switched the machine on and was wiping the counter when he suddenly felt a pair of arms encircling his waist.

"Conraaad..." Curiously, the voice was neither teasing, not enragingly seductive, more like... sweet, like a lover's voice. The vampire wasn't able to move as Hanna nuzzled his spine and rubbed his stomach in lazy circles.

"Conrad," the redhead breathed, more needily this time, and the vampire could feel him dropping kisses on the dark fabric of his shirt. The bony hands worked with surprising dexterity, pulling said shirt out of the black jeans and slipping underneath it to roam over bare skin. Conrad gasped - muscle memory was hard to override - and spun around, seizing the boy's shoulders.

"Hanna, no! You're drunk, you don't really want this- Stop it. Please." His glare wasn't as effective though, mostly because the loving touches had a very nice effect on his body.

The redhead blinked at his friend and slowly, the blue eyes filled up with tears. "I-I'm... sorry..." he said timidly and lowered his head. "I just..." He sniffed and attempted to squirm away. "I just-" He hiccuped softly. Conrad felt like a bastard.

"Hanna, don't start to cry on me, I just don't want you to-" he was cut off by an armful of redhead launching at his chest and sobbing into his shirt. For a few moments, the vampire chewed on his lips, then awkwardly put his arms around the sobbing boy.

"There-there... It's okay, don't cry... Everything is fine."

"I didn't mean- I like you and- just once-" Hanna was blurting out incoherent words, his mind too clouded by alcohol and the emotional rush. "I've never- so... I thought- I'm sorry...!"

Conrad couldn't really figure out what his friend was trying to say, but he guessed it wasn't that important. Hanna's thin frame was shaking lightly in his embrace, and it just felt so damn nice, to have somebody near, care for them, console them, be strong and reliable and important-

Hanna looked up with his tear-soaked face, as if pleading for something. Conrad gently removed the boy's glasses and kissed him.

He acted on a sudden impulse and the next moment, he realized that it was a very stupid one. But Hanna moaned into the contact, all but melted into the embrace, and Conrad's mind couldn't find an excuse to stop.

Hanna proved to be incredibly inexperienced, but equally eager. His hands dove into the vampire's dark hair, to keep him close, while Conrad sneaked his arms around the tiny waist. The frantic kissing was dragged out until Hanna couldn't take it anymore without oxygen; he tilted back his head with a loud gasp and panted as if he had run a race. Conrad couldn't resist kissing the pale column of the boy's throat.

Hanna moaned shamelessly and as the vampire pulled away, afraid that if he lingered any longer, he wouldn't be able to resist, he stared at Conrad, eyes half-lidded and pleading, moist lips shining, breathing still harsh.

Resistance proved to be futile. Conrad simply swept the skinny boy into his arms - wondering a bit how easily it went – and carried him to the bedroom. A lamp was lit, shoes and socks were toed off hastily; Conrad got rid of his shirt too, and crawled closer to Hanna, who apparently lost his way while struggling off his. The vampire gently pried the garment from the boy-

And he stared at the horrible scar zigzagging on Hanna's entire front. He have never seen anything like that, it wasn't even properly sewn up, just… stapled shut.

Still, it was not disgust that welled up in him but sadness and worry. Conrad reached out to trace the scar gently and he looked at Hanna to see if it caused him any pain. The boy's face held nothing but pleasure though. He even attempted to tug his friend closer for a kiss.

Well, Hanna deserved nice things. Conrad obeyed, gently pushing him back and tracing the slightly raised line with his lips. The boy squirmed and moaned, chanting the vampire's name.

"What is it?" Conrad finally straightened with a smile. "What would you like, Hanna?"

The pale face was flushed, the thick-rimmed glasses slipped off halfway and a bead of sweat was forming on the high forehead. Hanna licked his lips and peered at his friend. "Want you. Make me come."

Conrad could have sworn he have never heard anything as arousing than those few short words. Stifling a groan, he quickly squirmed out of his jeans and he approved that Hanna did the same - of course, the alcohol in his blood made it a more difficult task, but he managed.

Soon enough, they were both naked, snuggled up tightly, kissing and groping each other's bare flesh. Hanna seemed to be quite bold when intoxicated; and the sounds he made, the tiny mewls, moans and whines were driving Conrad crazy in the most positive sense of the word.

He had some difficulties figuring out just what to do, but he was a young man with Internet and a healthy sex drive, so he possessed the knowledge. Eventually, he curled his hand around both of their erections and began to tug on them.

It felt thrilling to have somebody so close, and Hanna was most responsive too, arching his bony frame and clinging to the vampire's shoulders as if for dear life. His hips jerked forward with every move Conrad made, and it only took a couple of minutes until the redhead's gasps became deeper, his nails dug into his friend's white skin and he came without warning, a short yell breaking free from him. His semen drenched Conrad's hand and splattered on their abdomen. It felt so hot, almost scorching, those pearly white drops.

Hanna remained tense after the orgasm, muscles still trembling, repeating the vampire's name. It took a few seconds for him to relax, and he did not protest the slightest, when Conrad rolled them over, pinning Hanna down with a snarl and began to move again, seeking his own fulfillment.

Somehow, things felt sharper, more vivid, more intense. Conrad have never felt like this before. Granted, he was rather lacking in the department of sexual experience, but he knew what pleasure was and how an orgasm was supposed to feel - and this right now far exceeded his expectations. He wasn't even making love to the redhead, just ground their hips together, letting the escaping fluids create the delicious friction, and it was still better than anything he knew. Conrad arched back with a moan, biting his lips until he tasted his own blood - and from that moment, everything sped up, the tension grew unbearable, and after a few agonizing moments, the orgasm crashed down on him, making the world white out for a few moments.

It was definitely interesting to wait out the aftershocks without breathing and a beating heart. For a moment, it crossed Conrad's mind that he wasn't even supposed to get an erection without any circulating blood in his system, but he decided that it was better not to pry.

The first thing he noticed was that Hanna had fallen asleep with the most innocent face ever. The vampire chuckled and fondly caressed the red tresses; then he walked out to wash and fetch a damp towel to clean up his guest as well. Later, Hanna was carried to the guest room and carefully tucked in; Conrad got a few tasks done and with the approaching dawn, he pulled back into his dark bedroom to sleep for the day.

When Hanna woke and in a mild state of panic, he searched his friend's flat, he came across a note on the kitchen counter.

"Dear Hanna

If you haven't already tried, please do not wake me. You know how vampires and the sunlight react and I'd be glad if I could avoid it. You'll find something to eat if you look, and when you leave, close the door and take the spare key with. You can give it back later. You're free to use the shower, too. Headache medicine is on the shelf behind the mirror.

I don't know if you remember anything from last night. If you don't, I swear you got nothing you didn't ask for. And if you do...

Thank you.

Conrad"

Hanna blushed a fetching shade of red, and grinned like a village idiot.


End file.
